Controlling the Clutter

Clutter.  It is the silent enemy that so swiftly sneaks in and takes control of a home.  I hate clutter.  It makes my chest feel tight and my armpits itch.  When there’s too much clutter in our house, I am prone, unfortunately, to transform into a snorting, raging mad lunatic with long angry tusks and drool in my beard not very nice person.  I'm working on that though!

Newspapers, school papers, Sunday school papers, papers, papers, papers!  Bouncy balls, assorted lego pieces, ink pens, receipts, birthday cards, magazines… need I say more?  Socks with no partner, shoes in the corner, coats on the table and bags on the floor.  Clutter, clutter and more clutter!  It’s everywhere!

I learned a long time ago the only way to maintain the threat, is to counter attack!  So here’s the plan I’ve put in place in Carpenterville to fight the war on clutter.

1.        Everything must have a home.  The hardest part about cleaning up aforementioned objects, is when you’re not quite sure where to put them.  I made a rule for myself that if I can’t find a place for everything we own – or we will no longer own it!  No matter the shape of our economy, we as Americans still have too much stuff and it doesn’t hurt a bit to thin out the toys box and clothes closet.

Over the years, I have accumulated quite a stash of Rubbermaid organizing bins.  I use drawers for the toys – those bouncy balls, Nerf guns, doll clothes, toy cars and Legos are divided in there – my goal is to label each drawer with the name and a picture of the item.

A basket or file box at an easily accessible location is perfect for all those papers.  Each week on Throwaway Thursday (or whatever day you choose) grab your basket and sift through the papers while your husband sits beside you watching the Cubs lose (I’m such a fair-weather fan).  Decide what papers can get pitched, which ones need to go in the basket by the toilet, or need to be filed.  All those precious scraps of paper your two-year old colored in Sunday School with a John Deere green crayon have two options – 1.  Pitch it.  Don’t leave me now -there’s another option!  2. Keep it in his Treasure Box!   What Treasure Box you ask?   I have a large Rubbermaid container for each of my children stored down in our basement.  Their names are posted on the side in large letters and my kids are so proud of them!  Inside the box, you can find their coming-home-from-the-hospital outfit, favorite blankie, baby book, and all those extra-precious papers.

Use drawer organizers to keep your desk or cabinets neat and orderly.  I personally prefer the little storage baskets you can find in the (where else) Rubbermaid aisle at Walmart.  The baskets are perfect to custom fit your needs – whether it’s the silverware drawer or for separating the pens from the paper clips in your desk.

I also keep a file for each person in our family in my filing cabinet.  In there, I keep schedules, immunization records, papers that will eventually be sent to the Treasure box, etc.  These are great because it keeps the information I need close at hand, but still off the top of the counter.

2.       Don’t put it down – put it away!  -Emilie Barnes

I like Emilie Barnes.  My kids probably don’t like what she said, but they hear it anyway!  Hers is a phrase I use often, and it’s a good reminder for myself.

To keep the clutter at bay, get in the habit of taking the extra 15 seconds to put your shoes in the closet, or sort through the mail rather than adding it to the pile on your desk.  Have your children join ranks and ask them to put their toys away before bedtime and toss their laundry in the hamper – rather than on the floor by the tub.

There are so many different ways to keep every room in your home organized and I hope to look at more ways in the future.  What else is cluttering up your home?  If clutter has taken over your house, pick a small area, set your timer for 5 minutes and see if you can have the area cleared by the time you hear the ding!

Walking into your home after a long day to see a cleared table with a bouquet of flowers in the center is one of the nicest gifts you can give yourself – and your family.  So don’t give up!  Stay at it and soon, you’ll have your home clutter-free!

A Letter From Erin Eve - Part 7

Erin and I were chatting on the phone this morning and she mentioned there was one more subject on her heart that she felt she should address - Jim.  I agreed and even though it’s not Monday, here’s one more letter from Erin Eve.

Forgiving Jim

 

 

            I woke up this morning with all the “Jims” on my heart!  What a surprise that was.  I realized that I need to share that corner of my heart that has been dusted off and polished up.  In my story I shared my feelings of hate towards Jim, but I want you guys in particular to know that healing took place - only through God’s grace.  Just as God forgives us so shall we forgive those who do wrong against us.  Jim was only following his flesh, doing what he thought would be best for me and ultimately himself. 

 

            Several years ago I actually bumped into Jim and believe me when I say there are no coincidences in life.  God has had his hand on my life all through this journey.  And don’t you just love God’s sense of humor?  He is a loving and gracious God who wants the best for us, not just mediocrity that we all too often settle for or think that is what’s deserved of us. 

While attending a church service to hear a guest speaker who was of interest to my husband, I had a life changing moment occur.  While in line to receive communion….God’s ways are so awesome, I glanced to my left and who would I see sitting there, but Jim!  I cannot fully describe the feelings that came over me, but it was something like “Hello GOD!” 

As I went forward to take communion with a smile on my face and flutter in my heart I realized that the hate I so long ago felt for Jim was completely gone.  I looked up at the huge cross covered in a purple sash and smiled even bigger when I saw the thorny crown.  I know that the Lord will have a crown to place upon my head just as the Bible says, only when I receive that one, I won't feel so ashamed, but freely loved.  

As I walked back to my seat and saw him with a beautiful family, my heart skipped to a beat of joy for him and I instantly prayed for him, for the first time.  I saw that he was a husband and a father, and he was in church….most likely seeking what I was seeking…a place to drop some heavy dirty chains.  

~Erin Eve

Eve Revealed - Part 6

It's been six weeks since I first introduced you to Eve - and what an incredible six weeks it has been!  

Eve and I have heard from so many people who have been touched by her story.  This past Sunday at our church, Firm Foundation Ministries, we were honored to be able to share her story and how God desires to redeem each of us.  I wish you could've been there! It was beautiful!

So who is Eve?  

 

On the day she was born, Eve’s parent’s gave her a name that means peace.  I do not believe that this is a coincidence.  For in my friend I see just that.   I see a woman who found peace through the gift of Redemption.

Her name means peace, and we call her Erin.  I'm proud to introduce you to my friend, Erin Eve Schwartz!

I asked Erin if she would tell us how her life has been since that night at the flagpole.  So, ladies and gentlemen, here's Erin Eve!
 

Now I Know…..He love even me

A Letter from “Eve”

 

 

 

            That night under the flag pole, when I finally gave in to God and stopped telling him who I was not.  When I feel into his loving arms and let him love on me.  That is really where the story begins, at least the good part.  Because you see, at that moment, my old self died.  I was remade new and washed white as snow.  I knew that God wanted EVEN me!

           

            From that point, I was like a new baby Christian.  Learning to crawl and walk, learning to hold The Lord’s hand and Trust in God.  That summer I worked as a waitress at a hometown restaurant and it was there that the man God had been molding just for me walked into my life.  I knew this handsome, sweet guy who looked oh so adorable in his ball uniform was not from around town.  Something drew me to him and I was bound and determined to be his waitress every time his ball team came into eats each week.  I knew something was very different about this mysterious sweet guy whose name was Tobey.

 

            When He asked me out the very first time, it wasn’t to go to a movie or dinner.  He coolly walked up to me at the salad bar and with a twinkle in his eye, he said simply asked, “would you like to go to church with me?”  My heart skipped a beat and I might as well have been the gravy sitting there on the buffet.  I knew this adorable, sweet, hunk was a gift that only God could send me. 

 

            We began emailing often once I was back at school, we didn’t even have a date yet.  We communicated by email only for 3 months before I actually called and spoke to him on the phone.  That conversation lasted 3 hours and I knew when I hung up that this was the man for me.  Before he hung up, he asked if he could pray for me!  As exciting as it was, there was still terror in my heart, because he didn’t know ALL about me.  God began working on me and Tobey would send me scripture that was exactly what I needed to hear for those particular difficult days that would come.  I had told him I had just recently given my heart to the Lord and was a new Christian. 

 

            I kept going to Campus Crusades and drawing near to God.  Baby steps….it was exciting, everything was so new and there was so much to learn, but through it all God was walking along side me for the times I would fall. 

 

            One glorious yet defining weekend Tobey picked me up and took me to Nashville Tennessee with him to visit his brother who was living there.  We had only had about 2 dates back home when I was home for some various weekends.  The sheer excitement and exhilaration of just simply riding next to him in his pick up truck was almost more than I could handle.  I wanted to shout from the Grand Ole Opry stage that I was in Love, a love like I had never known.  Tobey showed me all the sites and held my hand on a rainy carriage ride around the twinkling town.  When he told me he loved me, I thought I’d explode with joy!  I loved him more than I ever thought possible to love.  In his arms was the only place I wanted to be.  There was a severe blow to my heart as he drove us back to drop me off at my apartment at State…..I knew then that I’d have to tell my dream guy what I had done.  He had to know my most hidden secret before this relationship got any deeper. 

 

            I remember Tobey asking me if I was okay on the way back.  I told him I was just taking in all the great moments of the weekend, and I was tired.  In reality I was praying to God to help him understand, to someway let him still love me if I tell him.  I can still remember how I trembled and feared the worst…..that I would lose him. He put the truck in park in front of my apartment.  This was it…I had to tell him before I got out of the truck and he drove back up north.

 

            When I unhooked my seat belt and said I must tell him something, He took my hand and looked at me with those warm dreamy eyes and said “you can tell me anything.”  I blurted it out and sobbed in his arms as he held me.  He didn’t kick me out of the truck and leave me there on the curb as I had feared.  He hugged me close and told me that I can’t see it now, but someday you will be able to help so many others who have the same hurt.  I was quite shocked, I’ll admit.  I sort of wondered if maybe he was a little crazy!  What was he talking about?  He brushed back my tears and prayed with me that God would heal my heart and that I would trust in Jesus when times are tough.  
 

I remember him pulling away that night as I stood on the sidewalk.  I was smiling up to the heavens, thanking God for that man he had sent into my life at the most perfect time. 

           

            December 22, 2001 was one of the happiest days of my life.  I became Mrs. Tobey!  What a life we have built together.  We now have 2 precious, amazing boys that we thank God for daily.  I can’t imagine my life with out them I truly know, without a doubt that they are gifts from God. 

 

            It hasn’t always been peaches and cream since that night at the flagpole however.  You see, I left a huge pile of chains laying there on the ground.  I was no longer in bondage to my sin.  I accepted Christ into my heart and life, but I continued to carry in each hand a long dirty chain.  They would clank and grown heavy at times and I would think that I HAD to drag them around with me daily, but guess what?   God spoke to me as I began to press in to him.  I began to read the Word, the instructions he gave me as a new baby Christian.  I came to a pretty shocking revelation when I realized that I had been slapping Jesus in the face!  By holding onto chains of unforgiveness of myself.  Not receiving and believing God’s forgiveness, either by not confessing sin or by holding onto a self righteousness that says “I can’t forgive myself,” is prideful and ungrateful.  It places our own evaluation over God’s.  When we’ve been forgiven by others but do not accept it, that says that their forgiveness is not adequate.  

 

When God forgives his children, it is FINISHED, signed, and sealed and EVEN forgotten!

 

            Maybe you did what I did, or, maybe you were the drug addict, or the porn addict, or the adulterer.  Or, maybe you were like the Jim in my story.  When I wanted to be punished and I wanted to die, the shame and regret and guilt were at times too heavy a burden to carry.  But I’m so excited to be able to tell you that when the enemy said that I deserved a punishment, God touched me with his grace.

 

            Every sin – no matter how large – can be forgiven and swallowed in God’s infinite ocean of grace.  If you don’t believe me, if you are like I was all those years ago in the back of campus crusades and you need to go look it up, by all means please do it!  Go find 1John 1:7 “The blood of Jesus purifies us from every sin.”  It does not say “SOME” it says ALL!

 

            When my amazing, beautiful Woman of God friend Lynette asked me if I’d be willing to share my story on her blog, I hesitated.  She and Tobey really were the only one’s who knew the real story, all of my story.  She seemed so relaxed and calm about it.  She gave me the peace that I needed to share it and that there are surely more stories like mine that can help set people free from the chains we sometimes carry around.  I grew a strength and bold courage that only could come from God.  I saw that I was a child of God and that my darkest hour could be used for his Glory!  He was telling me to go tell.

 

            I want to encourage anyone carrying chains that they can not let go of, to drop them at the foot of the cross.  There is power and Freedom like you won’t believe in the sound of falling chains.  Press into God and stop telling him who you are not and let him be God. 

 

Hugs, blessing and Love to you all,

                        Erin Eve

Erin with husband, Tobey, and sons, Logan and Cooper

Cooper and Logan

 

Thanks Erin, for telling your story!  This journey together has been more incredible than I anticipated!  I know your testimony will bless thousands - it already has, I'm sure!

I had seen something deep beneath Erin's lovely, happy spirit a couple of years ago - some deep hurt.  I had no idea what that might be, but a couple of months ago as we sat together in a coffee shop, she told me her deep dark secret.  My immediate response was, "Erin, that only makes me love you more!".  I wish all of us could find the courage and strength to say, "that was then, but because of God's love for me, my 'now' looks a whole lot brighter!"


Erin and I went on to discuss some of her struggles over the years.  One being the loss of two more babies through miscarriage.  She and I also have both have our stories of dealing with infertility (I know, doesn't look like it anymore, right!), so we connected on that level as well.  She went on to tell me about a song her sister-in-law, Carma Schwartz Kelley from The Schwartz Family, wrote called "Until I Can" - speaking of losing a child.  (I wanted to have the song playing on here for you, but am having some difficulties getting it to happen.)
Erin said each time Tobey's family would sing this song, she had to leave the room.  

Today, though, she celebrates the life of all three children who are with Jesus.  She shared yesterday at church that she knows Jesus won't be running to her with open arms when she gets to Heaven - instead, He'll be carrying three babies as He comes to meet her!


If you would like to contact Erin personally, her email address is erineve@yahoo.com

Couponing with a Congressman's Wife!

I had the unique privilege of growing up with a pretty cool guy!  But, enough about Mat!   And don’t even get me started on Chris!  :)

No, this time I’m going to cue you in on my other brother – Marlin.  You may have heard of him??  He works somewhere in DC… Capitol Hill?  Maybe… something like that anyway?  But enough about him, too!  Let me tell you about the real hero - Marlin’s wife, my SIL, Christy!  (Gotta get my jabs in when I can!  I was the only girl in a family of three boys after all!)

If you want to talk about saving money or balancing the budget, Christy is your woman!  Recently, she has joined the growing number of women and men across America who are stepping into the world of COUPONING!  I am learning with her, and love the changes coupons have made to my own grocery budget.

This week, Christy and I had a chat about our new favorite subject, and I thought I’d share part of our conversation with you.

When did you start couponing? Just recently when food prices started going up and I needed to find ways to stretch my grocery money further.

How has it helped your family budget?  It has helped us to save more money to put toward other things, plus it has even helped our kids be more aware of the cost of food.  I saw a big improvement after the first month.  Once I got some experience, I started to be able to gauge how much I could save on certain items with coupons and sales combined. 

How much time does it take for you to coupon?  Every Sunday afternoon, I spend about 2 hours clipping, organizing and cleaning out coupons.  Then throughout the week I spend about 4 hours looking through sales circulars, checking emails for weekly deals, adding electronic coupons to my store cards and making out my weekly shopping lists.

Tell me about your most successful shopping trip.   I was able to save 50 percent off the total price of all of my groceries.  I found several items for free or for 50 cents or less using coupons.  One month, I was able to save over $400.

How do you keep it all organized?  I used a free template from the Krazy Coupon Lady.  It works well, but now that I'm getting the hang of couponing, I have a few personal preferences I might add to it.

Then, I followed your lead, Lynette, and borrowed some of Marlin's old Baseball Card storage sleeves to start.  Once my collection grew larger than the 10 pages he felt he could "spare", I bought my own at Walmart. (This is Lynette, and I feel I must interject here at the risk of having several hundred divorces on my hands.  Do not, I repeat, DO NOT remove your husbands old baseball cards from their sleeves and stick them in a Velveeta box!  It matters not the age of the Trapper Keeper you found them in, or the times you've packed and unpacked them in the seven moves you've made over your thirteen year marriage.  They are off limits and you would be wise to take your couponing self off to Walmart and buy your own - not that I'm speaking from experience.  Counseling costs much more than new baseball card sleeves!  Now back to Christy).  There are instructional videos from the KQL on various methods of organizing: by circular and date, by expiration date, alphabetically, etc...  I found Food Categories to be an easy way to do it, but I plan to re-arrange the food categories from aisle order to alphabetical order.

What are your favorite coupon links?   I sign up for emails from the Krazy Coupon Lady, CouponMom, and Bargains to Bounty.  I also sign up for emails from my favorite brands like Kellogg's, Betty Crocker, Johnson&  Johnson, Lysol and others.

Any final tips?  Don't quit.  The longer you try, the better you'll get at saving money and finding good deals.  Stick with it!  Also, save all expired coupons in a separate envelope to send to our military families.  Military grocery stores will honor coupons until they are 6 months passed their expiration date.

Canning is something else our family does together (I plan to blog more about this in the future).  We can or freeze corn, jams, beans, vegetable soup, tomato soup, tomato juice, peaches, applesauce, apple pie filling, chicken, beef...  I'm sure I'm forgetting something.  Just yesterday I spent only $25 on jam jars, lids, sugar and strawberries and now I have enough strawberry jam to last us up to two years.

Thanks Christy for letting us peek into your world a little bit.

 Here's the crew Christy and I are trying to feed:

 It's been a blessing to share lots of precious family time with Marlin and Christy - swimming at Meemaw's, canning days, and laughter, almost always laughter (have I ever told you how my carefully chosen dress for Marlin's swearing-in ceremony malfunctioned?  Sigh... Oh the woes of being the red-headed second born!  It always happens to me!).

I, personally, am not very good about keeping track of the numbers, so I don't know how much I've saved with couponing, but I do see a difference in how much I'm able to buy while staying within budget.    In fact, I've been able to donate to charity as well as start a small stockpile for my family.

I love knowing I can use this method to provide not only for my family, but also for those in need.  And hey, if a Congressman's wife does it...

Finding My Way Home - Eve's Story Part 5

For five weeks now, we've been following the story of "Eve" a woman who has kept the secret of an abortion buried for many years.  Here is Part 5 of her story.  Her identity will be revealed this weekend at Firm Foundation Ministries.   

Who is Eve?  Here are more details!

If They Only Knew - Part 1

A New Voice - Part 2

The Darkest Hour - Part 3

Going Through the Motions - Part 4

I sat chewing the blue cap of my pen.  I was in the back corner of a classroom trying to listen to my professor speaking about Children’s literature.  Still, I can’t help my daydreaming.  My eyes shift towards the window where I see people walking to their next class.  Were any of them at the Campus Crusade meeting I had been to?   I wonder what it would be like to have such peace like the people I saw there.  What would it feel like to be released from this heavy weight I feel in the core of my being?  To feel so free I could raise my hands and sing praises to the Lord like Joanna did last night.

To me it’s obvious the kids at Campus Crusades have never done anything to make them feel so bad…so…so dirty.  It would be wonderful to only have something minor - a small sin of some sort on my resume.  Why couldn’t I have been a “good girl?”  Why did I think it was ok to give myself away to Jim?  Why didn’t I value myself…respect myself enough to wait? 

I don’t know much about the Bible, but I’m sure in there somewhere it talks about sinners going to Hell.  I wonder if I even brought my Bible to State with me!  It’s likely under my bed back home.  I have to get my hands on one somehow!  Scary as it is, I have to know what the Bible says about girls like me.  I have to know if there’s any hope, 'cause much as I know I deserve it, I sure don’t want to go to Hell.

Suddenly I realize I’m the only one left sitting as my classmates pile out the door.  Grabbing my backpack I swiftly walk down the steps and out the door of the old brick building.  Mentally flipping through my options, I wonder if I could sneak a peek at Joanna’s Bible then just as quickly shook my head no!  If she caught me she’d ask too many questions when I tell her what I’m looking for - and I’m not about to answer them. 

Then it hits me….go to the bookstore!  Deciding to skip lunch, I walk swiftly across campus, hoping against hope that I’ll find my answer. 

My heart starts to beat a little faster and my stomach feels uneasy as I walk down the self-help aisle.   “Self-help”…that seems funny, I tell myself.  I bet there’s not a single book on these shelves that can help me!  Tipping my head to the right I begin scanning a myriad of titles – “Letting Go When It Hurts,”  “Healing After Adultery”, “What To Do When He Cheats”.  My heart sinks a bit when I realize there’s nothing for me.  Where are the books titled, “How To Heal After Killing Your Child” or “Finding Peace After Abortion”?

I feel defeated for a moment, and then I see it…The Holy Bible!  Right in middle of the shelf, there they are – white ones, red ones, brown…pink… black…. Bibles for men… Bibles for women - so many options!   I slowly reach for the black one – seems more appropriate for me.

“Can I help you?” a tall, skinny girl appears out of nowhere next to me.

I freeze watching her glance first at me, then the Bible in my hand.  Why did I feel like a kid caught with my hand in the cookie jar?  “Um, no… no thanks,” my face is burning and I want to get out of there, “I…I’m good.”  She smiles kindly, likely confused at my odd behavior then walks away.

Glancing up and down the aisle, assuring myself I was once again alone, I gently open the book with a shaky hand.  How long has it been since I read my Bible at home, three years?  Maybe four?  I used to enjoy reading the teen Bible I was given for catechism.  I had even memorized a few verses and I remembered enjoying Proverbs and Psalms too!  But now as I stand here holding this Holy book, I feel so ashamed. 

Does Jesus know that I’m sorry about what I did?  Does Jesus know that I need Him?  Ha, I’m sure He doesn’t want me anymore.  A tear falls on the page and I quickly shut it and wipe my face dry.  Feeling like I’m going to start bawling I shove the Bible back on the shelf, grab my backpack and make a beeline for the door.  Glancing up I see a sign – one that takes me back to that moment in the clinic.  Familiar red letters glare down at me as if to warn me.  “That’s right,” I tell myself, “time to make an EMERGENCY EXIT.  But, oh, if only!” The ever-present blanket of regret wraps itself tightly around me, “If only I had walked out the escape door on that horrid day at the clinic. “But you didn’t, Eve, you didn’t!”

*********

 

The next several weeks crawl slowly by until, at last, finals week has begun.  It’s so difficult to cram for five major exams when all I can think about is everything I have heard at Campus Crusades over the last three weeks.  After I had attended that initial meeting, I found myself wanting to go back - mostly out of curiosity.  Perhaps, I was clinging to a hope that I too can be “reborn”.  At least that’s what the girl in the meeting last week called it.  I’m still convinced it’s impossible for someone like me, but it’s a nice thought.  It helps ease the pain of the knife in my heart – at least for a moment. 

 

I feel a pang of sadness as I throw some clothes and shoes in a box.  Packing up our cozy dorm room to head home for the summer break is not as exciting as I had anticipated it would be.  It feels so safe here with Joanna.  Back home I’ll have to hide the truth again. 

Taping the final box of books shut, I sit on the floor with my head on my knees.  Joanna was still in class, and I was alone.  The words that a pretty girl named Samantha spoke at the last Crusades meeting were branded in my mind.  Tears flowed down her face as she told how she had been made new through Christ, “I’ve been reborn!” The excitement was evident in her voice.  “Jesus has forgiven me from my past!”  She had paused for a moment to collect her thoughts, then went on, “The blood of Jesus is sufficient to cover any and every sin I have ever committed.  If you don’t believe me, check out 1 John 1:7 or Psalm 130.” 

I found 1 John in the index at the front of the Bible I had found on a table by the door and thumbed towards the back of the Book. “But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, His Son, purifies us from all sin.”  Samantha was still speaking and I couldn’t remember the other verses she had mentioned. “You see, I didn’t save myself for my husband!  For so long I lived a life of promiscuity.  I was really looking for love and acceptance.  I was longing for a way to fill the empty void in my life, but I never found true peace and love until I met Jesus!” 

Even now, twenty-four hours later, her final words keep playing in my mind… “There is no sin too great for God to forgive… there is no sin too great for God to forgive…”    I jump off the bed, grabbed my wallet and find myself nearly jogging back towards the bookstore.   I must see for myself it that is true.  How can it be?  No sin too great for God to forgive?

With shaky fingers I put down the cash and faintly smile at the same girl from several weeks ago.  She smiles back and touches my hand as she softly says, “My personal favorite is in Psalms.  Chapter one-hundred-thirty.”  Surprised I look up, wasn’t that the verses Samantha had mentioned last night?  I whisper a shy “thank you” and take the book she had carefully wrapped in tissue paper.

 

“Psalms one-thirty… Psalms one-thirty… Psalms one-thirty,” I repeat her words over and over for fear I would forget them again.   Reaching the commons area, I look around and walk quickly to an empty table in the back corner.  My heart starts pounding wildly as I unwrap the Bible, careful not to bend its leather cover or crease the thin pages.  “Psalms, Psalms...found it!  Ok, chapter one hundred thirty,” my finger scrolls down the narrow column, searching, “Here it is!” I duck my head closer to the words as I drink them in.

If you, LORD, kept a record of sins,
Lord, who could stand?
But with you there is forgiveness,

For with the LORD is unfailing love
and with Him is full redemption.

My eyes fill with tears.  I know this has to be true.  It’s right here in God’s word.  But how can He forgive me?  I turn back to 1 John 1:7 again, reading the refreshing words over and over.  It feels like an ice cold drink of water after a long run.  I can’t get enough.  My eyes drop further down the page to verse nine.

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just

and will forgive us our sins and purify us

from all unrighteousness.

How my heart races as I read on and on.  A laugh from somewhere deep inside escapes me as tears drip on the pages.   I read it once more before gathering my bag and hurriedly making my way out the back doors.  Stepping outside I feel the warm sunshine on my face.  There’s no one nearby and I feel a spring in my step as I look up to the sky with a smile. 

********

Saying goodbye to Joanna and all the friends I made over freshman year is not easy.  “It’ll only be a few months and we’ll all be back together.” Joanna says with a smile.  “Let’s share an apartment next year,” she suggests as I wave goodbye and pull out of the parking lot.  My little red car is loaded down with all my gear.  Excitement fills me as I pull on to the highway and set the cruise for the four hour drive towards home.

 

My mind begins to tire two hours later so I shut the radio off and roll down the windows.  Switching lanes, I notice the new Bible peeking out of my tote bag on the seat next to me. 

 

Suddenly the GOD HATES YOU sign from the clinic flashes before my eyes.  “Will it ever stop,” I yell out.  My temperature begins rising I shout towards the sky, “God can’t forgive what I have done.  I’m no good.  I’m no good to You, Lord!” 

 

I want so badly to believe that I can be cleansed from my sin and the guilt to be washed away, but those visions of the sign torment me constantly.  I can’t see how I can have value to God after what I’ve done!

 

The steady stream of oncoming lights from the opposite lane buzzing by me brings me to a dark low I hadn’t felt since I wanted to run myself to death.  “What if… what if I just slowly cross over to the other lane in front of the next semi?”  My breathing is shallow and my fingertips feel cold and clammy.  “Come on, Eve, just a few feet to the left and all this pain would end.”  The visions of that terrible day in the clinic would be gone.  The fiery sign so boldly burned into my memory would disappear.  I could stop having to keep up the act and putting on my mask – the one that told the world I was a happy-go-lucky college student.  I deserve to be punished.  My eyes blur with tears as I peer at the speedometer… seventy-two!  Screaming now, I cry out, “What can I do?  I’m so sorry!  I'm just so sorry!”   

 

A blaring horn from a close call jolts me back into the urgency to slow down and gain control before I cause a major accident.  Easing my foot off the accelerator I grab for the Bible on the seat next to me.  Holding it up to my chest I pull off at a quiet gas station.  Only twenty miles to go and I’ll be home, but I just can’t go on anymore.  I’m just too burdened with guilt and shame.   Pounding my head on the steering wheel I shove a fist in my mouth to stifle the sobs I can no longer control.  Several minutes pass by before I sit back and catch my breath.  Slowly, I feel something new deep inside.  Something I haven’t felt in years…..I want to pray!

 

“Father…..Oh Father…I’m so sorry for what I’ve done.  I have not been able to accept your mercy and forgiveness, but I want to so badly.  Help me Lord.”

 

When I open my eyes, I sit numb and exhausted from the ride of emotions I had just been on.  It felt good to pray.  Maybe actually talking to God will help me, since I can’t talk to anyone else.  Lifting my hand to start the car again, the Bible on my lap falls open to John chapter eight.  I sit entranced, astounded by the story of a woman caught in adultery.  The people had brought her to Jesus – wanting to have her stoned.  Somehow I feel like I can relate to her!  I should be stoned too!  But I stop, stunned when I read Jesus’ response to her, “I do not condemn you, Go on your way and from now on sin no more.  I am the Light of the world.  He who follows Me will not be walking in the dark, but will have the Light which is Life.”

Light!  Life!  No more darkness!  A genuine smile and mended heart I clung to the words I had just read as I make the final miles home.  Over and over I lift my voice to sing a song I had learned as a child, “Jesus loves me, yes, Jesus loves me.”  The truth is beginning to take root in my heart for the first time in my life.  He wanted me!  He loved me!  He was willing to forgive me!  All I had to do was ask!

 

Pulling into my parent’s driveway, my attention is fixed on the flag slowly rippling in the breeze on daddy’s flagpole.  It strikes me odd how I picture the pole as a cross and the flag as Jesus.  I put the car in park and sit there just staring.  The still small voice speaks softly to my soul and a comforting warmth envelops me like never before, “Come to me.  Eve, won’t you come to me?”  With a joyful heart I burst from the car leaving the door wide open and run, falling to my knees at the foot of flagpole. 

 

Sobbing I cry out, “Father, I come to You broken.  I am hungry for You and want to know You.  Please Lord, come into my heart and make me new… and clean.  I admit I am a sinner and I want to stop trying to hide from You.  I believe Jesus died on the cross for my sins and it’s truly a gift that I don’t deserve.  My sins have separated me from You.  Father, I’m so sorry.  I want to turn away from the darkness of my past and live for You.  I believe Jesus is alive and that You hears my prayers.  Thank You for that, oh Father.  Please send Your Holy Spirit to help me obey and to do Your will for the rest of my life.  In Jesus name I pray…Amen.”

 

Rolling over onto my back in the soft green grass, I open my eyes and stare up at the starry sky for a moment.  Peace floods my weary soul and I let out joyful shout…”HALLELUJAH”!   I relish the feeling – something I’d longed for so many years, yet never thought would be mine to cherish.

Finally I rise. It’s time to go inside. I hesitate at the door of my mom and daddy’s house and turn to look back at the flag pole – back where I’d found my redemption.  The moonlight casts a sheen of light across the yard.  It is quiet.  Calm.  A weight had been lifted from my shoulders.  For so long I had felt imprisoned by my sin.  At times I was sure I could hear the clank of the chains with each step I took, every move I made and every single beat of my heart, but now, I felt light!  I felt free! 

I blink and rub my eyes, unsure if what I'm seeing is reality or simply my imagination.  Either way, I knew what I saw was a gift for me from my Jesus.  No longer could I feel the weight I had carried, no longer did I hear the clanking of each heavy rusty link, for there in the matted grass where I had given my life to Jesus was a big, rusty heap of chains.

Sixteen to Spotless

Life in Carpenterville is busy!   Six people, full schedules, friendships, hobbies, pets… the list goes on, all contribute to our way of life – and we love it!  Keeping our home clean is not something most of us are passionate about – note the sarcasm!  Ok, so really, I’m not passionate about it either.  I’d rather sit in the sun, read a book or well, almost anything else, than spend the day cleaning my house!  Still, it needs to be done!

Over the years, I’ve picked up ideas from here and there, and I’d love to share some of those with you today.  As always – I don’t claim to have all the answers – and not everything I do will work for your unique family.  I’ve tried many ideas and continue to tweak them to make it work best for our needs. 

I’m convinced that the most difficult part of any chore is mental!  Getting yourself talked in to getting off Facebook and scrubbing the toilet can take longer than cleaning the whole bathroom!   And when the cleaning list seems unending with your gotta-get-in-to-everything girlies, and can’t-hit-the-target-if-I-tried…so-why-should-I-try boys, feeling like cleaning might only happen when you’ve reached the Nesting Stage of pregnancy.   To me, that would be a pretty big commitment just to get a clean house, so here’s what I do.

Rather than spending day after day… after day trying to keep each room spotless, I started doing what I call STS (Sixteen to Spotless).  Through this plan, I’ve been able to keep our home fairly clean – and when Friday rolls around, it takes very little time to get the weekly housework done.

In my Notebook, (congratulations to Heather M. on winning yesterday’s Notebook giveaway!) I keep a section titled Home.  In there, I have listed each room in my house:

1.       Kitchen

2.       Master Bedroom

3.       Entryway

4.       Tyler’s Room

5.       Amy’s Room

6.       Etc.

7.   Etc.

Every single room/space in the house, from child’s bedrooms to office gets a number.  Each day, one of the rooms is listed in my Daily To-Do list titled: STS: Kitchen.  The next day will say STS: Master Bedroom and so on.  

I really do not enjoy the idea of Spring Cleaning – so I do it in 16 minutes a day.  Have you ever timed yourself to see how much you can do in 16 minutes?  Try it!  You would be amazed!  Suppose your STS for today was your dining room, here’s what you could do:

·         Set the timer then GO! 

·         Wipe down the sticky backs of the chairs you noticed at breakfast. 

·         Grab a broom and knock down all the cobwebs.

·         Wipe down the legs of the buffet table

·         Reorganize the drawers of the china cabinet. 

·         Wash those fingerprints off the windows.

Work only for 16 minutes then quit (ok, so there’s no 16 minute police that are going to show up and arrest you if you keep going).  The idea is to work steadily for a selected amount of time and then give yourself permission to move on to do something else.  If the room you’re assigned to for the day is simple with little to do, do what you feel needs to be done then go drink a Pepsi while patting yourself on the back – just don’t pull a muscle doing it.  If it’s the kitchen, you’ll likely use up all 16 minutes with more you could do.

Still, you’ll be amazed how much better you’ll feel when you open that shiny clean silverware drawer or glance at that cleared-off-for-the-first-time-in-three-weeks-catch-all-area.  And the best news is – it only takes 16 minutes out of your day!  Feel free to take Saturday and Sunday off!  :)

Windows & Light Fixtures:  You should’ve thought ahead here and asked your parents to give birth to a few Amish sisters!  Haha!  (Thanks to my friend, Erin, for that funny)  I don’t relish the thought of spending a WHOLE day washing windows or light fixtures, so I give myself a month to get it done (or I hire Arlene – yes, I admit it!  I have an Arlene.  She’s an Amish girl (not my sister though) who can get those windows cleaned in no time at all for ONLY $30!).  Yes, you read that right, what Arlene can do in 3 hours, I take 30 days.  I have self-diagnosed myself with CADD – that’s Cleaning Attention Deficit Disorder.  I lose interest pretty quick!

I chose two months: May and October for Windows and Lights.  Then in those months I am sure to wash the windows or fixtures in the room I’m cleaning during STS.  See, that was simple and painless. (I still prefer getting an Arlene though).

Gotta add this yet – there’s a lot of lonely SAHM’s out there - some more than others.  The way I was raised (Mennonite) we had work days where we got together in one another’s homes to help with bigger projects like washing windows, painting, canning applesauce, etc.  Maybe you have a group of friends that would enjoy forming a group to do that.  One way to keep track of a schedule for this is to go to the home of each woman on their birthday month.  If your friends all have birthdays in the same month, ditch them and find new ones!  JK!  Talk about it with them, I’m sure you’ll be able to come up with a plan.  This is a great way to build friendships, encourage one another and lighten the load!

So, are these ideas that work for you?  By the time you’ve moved through your entire STS list, cleaning the house each week should be easy-peezy!

Next Wednesday - Controlling the Clutter!

For more organization posts, click on the Home Label towards the bottom of the page.