It Is Well

It's the stuff from which fears are realized, ‘whys’ are birthed and the deepest of soul pain claws at your throat.

A mother shouldn't have to...  She just shouldn't have to…

She shouldn't have to walk out hospital doors with empty arms and a breaking heart.

Shouldn't have to rouse from a dream where he is still alive and happy and giggling... only to enter the hollow reality that his bed lies untouched.

She shouldn’t have to.

She shouldn’t have to choose what he’ll wear to his funeral.

Shouldn’t have to stand by his coffin holding a handful of Kleenex, unfulfilled plans and not enough memories.

Some question God.  Wondering how an all-knowing, all-loving God could allow such grief to take place?

He could have stopped this!  He could have spared them the pain!  Why didn’t He?

We listed out the the good his parents had done – their love for others… the ministry they’d birthed… the church they’d planted.  We reminded God of the crazy faith they possessed – their outlandish obedience.  Obedience that would scare the mess out of most Christians.  We considered the complete devotion to God… and wonder why?

Why did God allow their son to die?

They didn’t deserve this!

Yet as I watched my friend mourn the loss of her two-year-old son last week, I witnessed a strength that defies all earthly explanations.  

For on a cold day in Michigan, as the winter winds swirled through the headstones and out over an open grave in a small town cemetery, a young mother cried in a church down the street.  Before her, a tiny white coffin held the body of her little boy. 

There at the very point where her greatest loss and deepest fears were realized, this grieving mother rose up and worshipped...and in her worship, God came near.  

There’s a surreal beauty that comes from a heart that’s surrendered. 

Through her pain, Malyn found comfort by choosing to worship the One who had given Camden to her in the first place…this child who needed a family and a home and a name.  She invited the congregation to sing one of Camden's favorite songs with her.

Far be it from me to not believe
Even when my eyes can't see

And this mountain that's in front of me
Will be thrown into the midst of the sea

Through it all, through it all
My eyes are on You
Through it all, through it all
It is well

So let go my soul and trust in Him
The waves and wind still know His name

And it is well

With me.

(Bethel Music)

Malyn's act of release and surrender shook the place, leaving no one untouched.  

And in it we witnessed the power of love – no matter the cost.

You see, loving comes without guarantees.

Love makes us vulnerable to pain.

Brian and Malyn were not promised thousands of tomorrows with their son.  Oh, they hoped for them – likely hadn’t considered the alternative.  What we saw on the day of his adoption was the beginning of a lifetime of happy memories…and really – that’s exactly what they got… even if the lifetime was much shorter than anyone could have imagined.

So the question comes down to this - is love worth the risk?  Worth the possibility of pain?  Worth the price of loss?

Some would lash out at God – blaming Him for not stepping in.  Accusing Him for allowing such tragedy.  But the truth is this - death was never God’s plan.  He never wanted tiny coffins.  Never wanted empty cribs, crying mothers and hurting fathers.  That wasn’t His original design.

On the day sin entered the world, God the Father was the One left with empty arms, broken dreams and unfulfilled plans.  The separation brought Him such grief and He longed for what once was…wanted it so much so that He took a risk and laid all that He had on the line in hopes of winning us back.

The death of His own Son, Jesus, was the price God paid for the chance to love us and call us His own…and He did it knowing there was a possibility we’d turn Him down. 

It was a risk, but He did it anyway. 

Did you know He loves you that much?

Loved you enough to risk it all?  All in the hopes that you would accept the love He has to offer?

He did and He does…and He’ll never stop… because death might separate, but it can’t keep a Father from knowing your name, longing to hold you and loving you still.

The offer stands ready... I hope you will receive it.

Camden David Sneed
June 1, 2013 - January13, 2016

Click here to watch Camden's funeral.   The sermon was preached by Camden's grandpa, Don Smith.

(A GoFundMe page has been set up to help with the funeral, medical and adoption expenses for Camden.)

If this story has touched you, please share it with others.  Camden's life impacted us all and we want many to know the love he taught us in just two short years.

Camden David

May I tell you the story of a little boy?  A little boy who came into our lives such a short time ago only to leave it before we were ready?

What love this little boy knew. 

Our friends, Mark and Tammy, brought him into the lives of our FFM family as his foster parents. We loved watching our youth kids claim "Baby D" most Sunday mornings during worship - they couldn't get enough of him. 

Then we celebrated with Brian and Malyn Sneed when they announced their desire to adopt him.  2015 was a year of ups and downs as we hoped and prayed with the Sneeds while waiting for the adoption process to go through.

Finally, it was settled... December 23rd  was the big day.  Friends and family packed the courtroom to witness Camden finding his forever family. 

It's official!  Camden is a Sneed!

And then began the few short days that were filled with so much joy - Christmas celebrations, a visit to the Polar Express and the whole family cheering Alabama on to victory.

They couldn't have known how short their time with Camden was... and we can't pretend to understand the whys.  Can't pretend to willingingly accept his death without questioning... without anger... without heartbreaking grief. 

Why would a healthy little boy simply slip away in his sleep?  In our minds it makes no sense but this one thing offers comfort... Camden went from joy to joy. 

He lived a short life, yes..but because so many chose to open their hearts to love, Camden was given the gift of a beautiful life, a home and a name. 

We grieve and cry and question and...and still... all we can come back to is this. We hurt, but what a privilege was ours - the ones who knew him - to be a part of loving him. 

And in it we see a reflection of God. He, too, opened up His heart to love. He, too, paid a great price to make us His own. He, too, took the risk of loving us - to offer us a life worth living...a home...and a name. 

Love..it makes you vulnerable to pain.  Some fear it - questioning if it's worth the risk..but this we know...The Brittons, the Sneeds, the Smiths.. the FFM church families.. We wouldn't trade a thing...for to give up the pain of losing Camden would mean never knowing him at all.

And in this we stand and declare that God is still good and He can be trusted.

***

Many have asked how they can help.  For those who don't know - Brian and Malyn are the founders of Impact of Hope. They have the most giving hearts of anyone we know and it has been their joy to call the body of Christ together time after time to offer hope to those who are facing tremendous pain, illness or loss. 

Now it's our turn to give back.

We have set up a GoFundMe page where all donations will be given to help with the funeral costs for Camden as well as any other expenses from his medical care.

In all honesty, our personal hope is that we can raise enough to cover not only those expenses, but also be able to give towards their adoption costs as well.

The Sneeds are givers and are not accustomed to being on the receiving end but we know so many love them and this is our way of being able to show them how very much we care about them - especially now as they grieve the death of their son.