Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Day 16 - There Are No Words

I've had this "Thankful" on my mind since I started this series, but I have a problem.  I have no words to say what's on my heart.  The feelings I have deep in the pit of my soul are a mixture of sorrow, turmoil, unworthiness, the list goes on.  I fear, no I know, I will be unable to grant the subject the honor, respect, and reverence it deserves.

As I sit here in the comforts of a cozy restaurant, enjoying the warmth of my surroundings, I truly have no words.

How do I express my thankfulness for the life I have been given.  I am thankful, yet I can't help but feel unworthy.  I know the blessings I have are blessings I do not deserve.  There is nothing I have done that gives me greater priority in the eyes of my Heavenly Father, yet, He has chosen to bless me.

While some are tempted to question "Why me?" when faced by trials in life, I am often brought to a place where I question "Why not me?"

So today, I will give thanks for the blessings of safety, health and plenty.  But even as I say these words, I must remind myself of the child in Haiti who seldom leaves my mind.  He is the one who sits staring into space. He is alone.  I wonder if he is thinking of his mommy and daddy.  I wonder what thoughts go through his mind.  His picture hangs above my desk and I pray for him often.

And then there are the women in India.  No matter how much I read, the atrocities they face daily would astound me, I'm sure.

Theirs is a life of prostitution.  Their children must have food and their is no other way.

I cried as I read the story of one woman in particular.  Her baby was not yet six weeks old and was left in the care of her husband who sat outside the door of her tent collecting money from customers.  The men that come to see her show no mercy.  The rampant spread of AIDS in her area serves to remind her that this is more than a means to an end... she is gambling with her life - yet, what options does she have?

So today, yes, I will be thankful.  I am abundantly blessed.  But in the midst of my gratefulness, I will open my heart to God and ask Him to show me the way to help make a difference in the lives of those who do not know these blessings.

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