Throwing Rocks

When my husband, Tim, was a (super-cute) little boy, he got in trouble one day.

It happened on a Sunday morning in the church parking lot.  The service had already ended and while his parents visited with friends inside, Tim found a rock…now he just needed something to throw it at.

He looked around, and there it was – coming down the road.  Perfect!  A moving target! 

As the car approached, Tim hauled off and threw with all his might.

This happened several times until…his dad found out. 

Tim was so busted.

To make matters worse, his dad decided to wait until they got home to incorporate Tim’s punishment.  Tim was sick about it.  Hoping to avoid the inevitable, he became the sweetest, most loving child he could muster up – hoping to change his father’s mind.

On the ride home, he sang out, hoping his father would hear him and either forget or relent.  But, unfortunately for Tim, 'Jesus Loves Me' and 'The B.I.B.L.E.' didn’t bail him out. 

As soon as they pulled up to their home, his dad told Tim to meet him in the office (wa…wa…waaaa…).

Isaiah gave a prophecy saying, “these people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.”  Jesus repeated those words Himself when talking about the religious.

Tim’s story and Isaiah’s prophecy have a lesson in them for us today and as much as I would rather give words full of atta-boys and way to gos – I can’t.

Why?

Because the rock throwing has to stop.

It just does.

It’s no secret that the world is full of crazy!  It’s easy to feel overwhelmed and discouraged. 

I get it.

It’s a mess.

But when the words coming from the lips of God’s children are like so many rocks in the hands of a little boy, then we have issues.  

I wrote last week about Sisterhood, about the need to be the safe place for one another within the walls of the Kingdom – and I stand by that still.  But I also feel compelled to cry out to my brothers and sisters to stop throwing stones!

While in worship yesterday, as the church sang out about how God makes all things work together for our good – I saw it – the Western body of Christ, much like a little boy singing in the back seat on the ride home, hoping their Father will forget or ignore their sin – after all, look at us now – so clean, so happy, so sinless.

You see, Tim wasn’t singing his Sunday School songs for God…or even his dad.  No, he was singing for himself.

He knew punishment was coming and he hoped his quick fix would reduce or even eliminate his impending punishment.

To worship God in order to gain His approval for our benefit is the exact same thing. And it’s idolatry.   It is the worship of self.

God isn’t looking for worshippers whose only focus is what they, themselves, will gain from their act.  That’s not true worship!

Either way, God still knows – He knows about the rocks we’re throwing at the world (filthy sinners), He knows about the stones thrown inside the church walls (did you hear what she did?  eyeroll) and more than that – a cute outfit isn’t enough to hide the emotional affair you’re having at work… the neatly pressed shirt and tie aren’t enough to hide the secret links you like to pull up on your smart phone... He knows.

And He wants so much better for you.

All the singing….all the good works…all the Sunday morning attitude changes aren’t enough.

Is the world a mess?

It is.

But when our lives are just as messy, we have no business going out and condemning others just because their sin is open – and ours remains neatly hidden inside the whole Christian package.

It’s time for the church to shut their mouths for a moment and study their hearts.  What are your motives?  What are your thoughts?   Do you hate your sister in the church?  Are you justifying a secret sin? 

It needs to end!

And when after the shutting up…the self analysis… the repentance is over and we find ourselves fully surrendered in the Presence of God, it is then we can rise up and honor Him with our lips from a pure heart.

Sisterhood

It’s been stirring in my soul. 

A message… always churning…

Unsettling…

Disheartening…

Longing for something better...

It’s the stuff that disquiets the spirit and steals rest… and so, I will speak, praying to God that it brings a greater depth of love and unity, acknowledging that I too, I know the struggle.  Know it well, for it is one I battle daily.

I see inside the walls of the Western Church, women who are grasping for meaning… for value.  And in the struggle for that which brings inner peace, we’ve stepped on and over our sisters…we've caused wounds... we’ve brought pain.

Does this message apply to the men?  It does.  But for this moment, let’s let it be us.  Just us.  The women…

We sit next to each other in the pews.  Worship with passion within reach of one another, yet inside is a struggle that divides and destroys.  It is the age-old lie that Satan has used from day one.  The very lie he used to convince Eve to taste the fruit.

You…are not…enough… 

You don't measure up.  

You're missing out on something better.

Once our attention is in his grasp, the barrage of convincing ‘truths’ overwhelms our minds, binding us.  Consuming us.  Keeping us from the ability to give and receive grace and soon we chime in, adding our own beliefs to the enemy's collection of divisive and destructive lies.

She doesn’t like me.

They’re talking about me.

They think they're better than me because I'm a single mom…an ex-addict…a current addict…an adulteress...a SAHM…a career mom…(you fill in the blank).

I wish I was as skinny as her.

I could do that better than her.

She’s so stuck up.

She's so perfect… I'll never measure up.

Who does she think she is?

And on and on and on and on it goes. 

“But I love Jesus,” we say.  And love Him, we do.  Yet as our love for Jesus remains steadfast, our actions and our thoughts are busy elsewhere leaving me convinced that Satan doesn’t need our hearts to do his bidding – he just needs our attention.

Eyes off Jesus, no longer overwhelmed by His Amazing Grace, we are best able to focus on all that Satan wants us to believe about others…and ourselves… and there, in the clutches of his message for us, we find ourselves bound in a web of turmoil, loneliness and pain.

Want to hear the real truth?

None of us – not one is exempt.  We all have our struggles… our doubts... our fears.  We all hear the lies.   Whether your sister across the aisle is your friend or not, the saying holds true - we likes to be liked… or at least tolerated.

Somehow, we have created a belief that unity is only attainable when all parties agree with one another on all issues.  

Not so. 

Unity is not uniformity. 

Are we all different?  Yes – in so many ways.  In our looks, our talents, our relationships, our skin color, our size, our tax bracket… but we have one thing in common – we are covered by the righteousness of Jesus – and that, my sisters, is why Satan is seeking to gain your attention.

He hates what he sees when he looks at you.  He hates when he sees us loving on one another…encouraging one another…growing together – and so his main objective is to bring pain, uncertainty and division.

Ask my kids and they’ll tell you the many times I’ve told them that “there are billions of people in this world – many who are ready and willing to hurt your feelings and cut you down… but when you walk in these doors, you are free to be you. 

Inside the walls of our family I will not allow you to slander, mock and hurt one another. 

In here, you’re accepted… you’re safe. 

In here, we build each other up and encourage when another is down. 

In here, you’re always loved…without question…without reservation.

In here…in here, we do grace.”

And to you, my sisters in Christ, I say the same.  Can we make this our mantra?  Can we commit to doing this for one another?  Can we agree that this world is broken and hurting and sometimes the weight of it all wearies the soul and weakens the spirit?  Can we agree that inside the doors of the Kingdom, we need a respite?  A safe retreat?

A place where we can see beyond what meets the eye and love the soul within?

There are billions of people in this world, sisters.  Many who are ready and willing to hurt your feelings and cut you down… but when you walk in these doors of the Kingdom, you are free to be you. 

Inside the walls of our family, must we slander, mock and hurt one another?

Can we instead say… 'in here, you’re accepted… you’re safe?'

In here, we build each other up and will encourage you when you’re down. 

In here, you’re always loved…without question…without reservation.

Because in here, we do grace.

“Let me give you a new command: Love one another.

In the same way I loved you, you love one another.

This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other.”

-John 13

Motherhood

I was twenty-two, the day love was laid in my arms. 

He was 8 pounds 3 ounces – or was it 4?  I don’t remember – but what I never shall forget is an awakening in my soul.   A person I had never known was born that day – and it wasn’t my firstborn – for as my son entered the world, a new version of me arrived with him.

There’s just something about motherhood. 

It unmasks our souls and reveals our vulnerabilities.  Yet at the same time, it unveils courage, boldness and a love that is altogether fierce, reckless and unbreakable.

It has the unexplainable ability to duplicate that intense devotion time and time again - no matter how many children a mother brings into this world.

For me, it was four.

Four souls who forever altered mine.

I have known the pain of tears on the second Sunday in May – days with empty arms and empty prayers.

And I have known the tears of exhaustion – when prayers were realized and arms were full and patience short and demands unmet and endless work and...and… and then the years when guilt plagued my mind – knowing all I really wanted for Mother’s Day was to be alone for a few hours.

As a mother, I have learned patience and I have not.

I have been fearless and I have been afraid.

I have known success and I have known failure.

I have laughed, cried, questioned and learned as a mother more than in any other relationship I’ve known.

And in it I’ve seen the heart of God – a God who loves His children with a fierce and uncontainable passion.  A love that cannot be earned…cannot be stopped… cannot be broken nor can it be demanded. 

It just is.

And in it I’ve discovered His grace – for though I am imperfect, He allows me the gift of knowing what His love for me feels like – both given and received.

And I am changed. 

Can a mother forget her nursing child?

    Can she feel no love for the child she has borne?

But even if that were possible,

    I (God) would not forget you!

16 

See, I have written your name on the palms of My hands.

Isaiah 49

Who's Your Rahab?

I've been thinking about giants and Rahabs and wilderness living…

In our walk with God, we yearn for the day when we reach our destination.  Our promised land.  But, yet, I see in the modern church culture the same fear of giants the Israelites experienced.

Our giants look different. 

They resemble giant corporations that spew hatred towards Christianity while promoting acceptance, love and world peace. 

It looks like the church down the street that doesn’t hold the same values as ours…sending us into avoidance, competition, slander and self-destruction.  But, boy, do we all love our Jesus.

Today’s giants are the voices that promote fear, proclaim shame and announce doom.  These voices stir Believers to an action that sends us straight back to the wilderness.

Boycott!

Turn!

Run!

And then there’s Rahab.

Yes, we know the Isrealite's future was in God's hands… but from their side of history, they only knew they had to trust that Rahab hadn't ratted them out. 

Imagine placing your life… your future… your promise from God into the hands of a harlot.

Gasp!

Instead, we refuse to dirty our hands with the least of these.  We tsk, tsk over their shameful way of life and pray our sweet Jesus will come quickly and save us from this old sinful world.

I get it.  Trust me, I get it.

I get tired of giving up my time, my resources, my comfort.  I get nervous about stepping into the land of giants.  I don’t want to hang out with Rahab.  But do we really expect people to live and love like Christ… without having Him in their life?

There’s a promised land on the horizon, and avoiding conflict sends me back to the wilderness…leaving the giants to enjoy my promise… and leaves Rahab without a Redeemer.

What does claiming Jericho look like?

It means trusting God no matter where He leads you.  It means loving the unlovable.   It means praying blessing over those who despise you…something that, admittedly, doesn’t feel good in my mouth. 

But in the end, it changes…it changes me.

Avoidance has been the name of the game too long.  My whole life this has been the Christian mantra – if a business reportedly supported something bad, BOYCOTT! 

We’ll show them!

But stop and think about it.  What are we showing them?  We’re showing them the opposite of who Jesus is.

He came to serve and to love.

He gave unselfishly – even to those who would betray Him.

Imagine shaking off the self-righteous, condescending, pious approach, and instead going inside the walls of your Jericho and finding someone to love… someone who has nothing but a messy, broken life to give in return.

Does refusing to extend love and grace really win them over in the end anyway?  Or is it more about keeping our garments unspotted from the filth of this world.

Truth is, you can live in the wilderness.  You can build a shelter, eat manna and dream of the good things you enjoyed back in Egypt.  Ahh.. the good ole days… when you were… living in bondage… yeah.. those days.

But then there’s Jericho.

The place where God has called you to.  You see, we beg God to show us His will for our lives… but at the first sign of discomfort, we cave.

Yes, there are rivers to cross, giants to face, and you may have to befriend the town harlot.  But if that’s what God uses to get us to our promised land, why would we question Him?

The world has seen what it looks like for the body of Christ to remain on the banks of the Jordan…and they’re laughing.   We’ve showed them what powerless Christianity looks like… maybe it’s time to show them a new kind of Christian. 

The kind that crosses over into the land of giants, loves the unloveable, extends peace, offers hope and lives fearless… because we know that God is ultimately in control.

Called to Lead

Are you called to lead?

Has anyone ever told you there are great things ahead of you? People to minister to? Women to encourage? Souls to lead?

So what does leading look like?

Who are the ones you will lead?

Years before David was given a robe and a crown, he was given sheep. His days were spent leading them to find lush fields of grass and cool water to drink. 

And then one day… he was called.

Imagine the thoughts racing through his mind. Imagine the expectations he might have had.

Leading sounds so glamorous… so important… so… so significant. Yet, if you read the life of David, you’ll see that the road to the palace was paved with long, frustrating, and often lonely experiences.

Surely there were days when he questioned the calling… the anointing brought to him by Samuel. In fact, when Saul first began to threaten David’s life, David found himself being followed “by those who were in distress or in debt or discontented”.

Nice crowd.

Definitely not the following most leaders would dream of. But 1 Samuel 22 says that these men “gathered around him, and he (David) became their leader.”

These men would go on to become David’s mighty army – men who would slay giants, protect their future king and willingly fight for the God whom David served.

Who are you leading? Are they distressed? Down and out? Maybe even annoying, at times?

Perhaps. But don’t miss the ones in front of you.

David saw in that group of men, people who needed a leader. He was called to lead – and though he wasn’t seated on a throne, surrounded by servants willing to aid at any given moment – he did what he was called to do.

It didn’t matter who they were… happy or sad… rich or poor… pleasant or annoying… he simply saw them as a sheep without a shepherd… and he lead them.

Jealousy

There’s an old story about a king who had all he wanted at his disposal.  He lived in a palace, had many servants, a great army, wives, children and a power that few mortals get to experience. 

Yet, much of his reign was spent pursuing a young field hand from several towns over.   The kid had done nothing to the king.  In fact, the young man had actually placed his own life on the line in an effort to protect the kingdom – and he came out the victor!

Interestingly enough, that’s where the trouble started.

The townspeople were so impressed by the young boy that the king could no longer enjoy the lavish blessings surrounding him.  Instead, his entire existence was consumed with jealousy over the victory that the boy had experienced… a victory the king, himself, could have claimed had he been willing to step out in faith.    It wasn’t long before his jealousy so consumed him, that he left his palace in pursuit of David with one goal in mind – kill him.

King Saul’s seething jealousy of David, the shepherd boy, is found in 1 Samuel.  There we read of pursuits in the wilderness, hunger, danger, depression… and even royal potty breaks in dark caves.

Because of Saul’s focused hatred for David, he eventually finds himself sleeping in the wilderness surrounded by a bunch of smelly guys while his wives slept peacefully in the beauty of their palace home. 

Saul’s morning constitution meant attempting to find a comfortable position in the darkness of a grimy cave so as not to dirty his royal robes while relieving himself.  What he didn’t know was that his nemesis, David, was watching him from behind a rock several feet away.  David even cut off part of the king’s robe to prove it. 

Their story begs the question: what pulls us away from Kingdom living?  What takes us so far from our palace that we find ourselves in the filth of a life we never expected to experience again?

Was David a great kid?  Yes. 

Did he do some pretty amazing things?  Umm… yeah - carrying Goliath’s head around in a gunny sack is pretty… umm..noteworthy (gag).

And though David might have had just as many (if not more) Twitter followers as King Saul, he also possessed a respect and a love for his king.  A respect that kept him from stealing the kingdom – a respect that kept him from taking Saul’s life no matter how often he had the opportunity.  A respect that demanded others view Saul with the reverence his position deserved.

Saul saw David as a threat.  He hated anyone admiring David more than they admired him and he missed out on kingdom living simply because he was unable to move past the bondage of jealousy.

He missed nights at home with his wife. 

He missed afternoons playing ball with his sons. 

He missed seeing his daughters skipping happily through the palace halls. 

He missed opportunities to use his power to do good for those around him.

He missed leading his people.

Isn’t it sad?   The things that we so willingly give up in our pursuit of ruining someone else’s life?

What has the power to draw you out… away from the life God has intended?

It’s ironic that it is often the things… often the people we struggle with loving the most that pull us into a wilderness existence…far from the palace of Kingdom living? 

To be jealous of another is bad enough but to be willing to give up the pleasures of Kingdom living simply to ruin the life of another – is it worth it?

Count the cost.

Consider the price.

It’s unlikely that Saul ever considered that though he would never have given up his kingdom to David, he in essence gave it up for him.  The appetite for David’s death outweighed the ability to let his jealousy go and enjoy the life God had intended for him.

And, in the end, he lost his kingdom.

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