Building in Babylon

There’s a story in the book of Jeremiah that we talk little about.  Yet, in it you will find one of the most well known verses in the Bible.  

Chapter 29 begins with the prophet writing a letter to the people of Jerusalem who had been captured and taken to Babylon.  I can only imagine what being exiled to a foreign land must feel like.  The changes in culture and language.  The loss of home and family and freedom.  

How scared they must have been.

I wonder at the excitement they must have felt when news of the letters arrival spread throughout their community.  I can actually feel the hope that must have coursed through their veins with the expectation of deliverance that was most certainly spelled out in the pages they now held.

Surely, this captivity was about to end!  Soon they would be set free from this bondage and back to the very thing they longed for… home!  

To life as it was... before.

I can imagine the scenarios that played through their minds as they began to open the letter.  Was there a secret plan in place?  Had Jeremiah come up with a way to help them escape?  Was he even now just outside those city gates preparing to set them free?

And how their hearts must have broken when they saw those first words, “This is what the Lord says.. ‘Build homes, and plan to stay.’”

Plan to stay?

No!! 

Just reading these words thousands of years later brings tears to my eyes.

Build homes? 

Here? 

In Babylon?

The letter goes on to encourage the exiled people to not only build homes but to plant gardens… get married… have children… and then have them marry!  

Wait.. what?

“We’re gonna be here that long?!?”

As Christians today, we focus so often on being set free from bondage.  And, yes, there are many bondages we should seek to be free from.

But we cannot deny that there are situations in our lives that we cannot change.  We cannot avoid. And we cannot escape.

Which begs the questions - what does your Babylon look like?

The death of a dream?  A marriage?  A loved one?

Loss of health? Home? Finances?  

Or can it be summed up by simply saying “COVID-19”?

Babylon is that place we land unwillingly and with no desire to stay.  And to open our minds to the idea of putting down roots and learning to live… no… even thrive in Babylon is offensive to our senses.

I shared this concept with a group of teens recently.  Many of them are living in the Babylon of broken homes.  It is not of their choosing - yet they have no other option.  Their current condition is based on the choices of others.  

And they must reap the consequences.

I challenged them to look even further into Jeremiah 29.  In verse 7, the people are told to “work for the peace and prosperity of Babylon.  Pray for it.  For its welfare will determine your welfare.”

What??

Pray for the peace and prosperity of my Babylon?

No!

I don’t want to live here!  

I. want. to. go. home.

Back to before.

Back to normal.

We can wail and scream and cry.  Search for a means of escape… ignore the obvious… and attack those around us.

But when you’re in Babylon… you’re in Babylon.

At the moment when their hearts couldn’t have sank deeper into their chests, hope appeared on the pages of that letter.

Yes, they were stuck in Babylon.  Yes, they were asked to accept their reality and learn to live with it.  

A hard ask. 

But then the Lord gave those beautiful words we love to claim without acknowledging those earlier sentences… He said, “I know the plans I have for you.  They are plans for good and not for disaster.  Plans to give you a hope and a future.”

He goes on to invite His people to search for Him wholeheartedly with the promise to end their captivity and restore their fortunes - but it wouldn’t happen for seventy years.  

Life had changed.  And it would never look the same for them again.

Sound familiar?

I asked earlier what your Babylon looks like.

How long have you been there?

How hard has it been?

Does the thought of staying offend your senses?

I get it.  I do.

And while your Babylon might look different than mine, I invite you to link arms and join me in praying for the peace and prosperity of our individual Babylons even as we shake the dust off our weary hearts and begin searching for ways to build a life inside our situations.

Take comfort in knowing that God knew where to find the exiled people - after all, the letter reached them even though they were far from home.  He knows where to find you as well.

When we stop searching for a way to escape Babylon, it is then we can pick up a hammer and begin building a new life inside the wrong side of the walls we so despise.

It may not be where you’d choose to be… but if that’s where you are, I hope you will find courage to rise up, build, plant roots and thrive - even in Babylon.

Sisterhood

It’s been stirring in my soul. 

A message… always churning…

Unsettling…

Disheartening…

Longing for something better...

It’s the stuff that disquiets the spirit and steals rest… and so, I will speak, praying to God that it brings a greater depth of love and unity, acknowledging that I too, I know the struggle.  Know it well, for it is one I battle daily.

I see inside the walls of the Western Church, women who are grasping for meaning… for value.  And in the struggle for that which brings inner peace, we’ve stepped on and over our sisters…we've caused wounds... we’ve brought pain.

Does this message apply to the men?  It does.  But for this moment, let’s let it be us.  Just us.  The women…

We sit next to each other in the pews.  Worship with passion within reach of one another, yet inside is a struggle that divides and destroys.  It is the age-old lie that Satan has used from day one.  The very lie he used to convince Eve to taste the fruit.

You…are not…enough… 

You don't measure up.  

You're missing out on something better.

Once our attention is in his grasp, the barrage of convincing ‘truths’ overwhelms our minds, binding us.  Consuming us.  Keeping us from the ability to give and receive grace and soon we chime in, adding our own beliefs to the enemy's collection of divisive and destructive lies.

She doesn’t like me.

They’re talking about me.

They think they're better than me because I'm a single mom…an ex-addict…a current addict…an adulteress...a SAHM…a career mom…(you fill in the blank).

I wish I was as skinny as her.

I could do that better than her.

She’s so stuck up.

She's so perfect… I'll never measure up.

Who does she think she is?

And on and on and on and on it goes. 

“But I love Jesus,” we say.  And love Him, we do.  Yet as our love for Jesus remains steadfast, our actions and our thoughts are busy elsewhere leaving me convinced that Satan doesn’t need our hearts to do his bidding – he just needs our attention.

Eyes off Jesus, no longer overwhelmed by His Amazing Grace, we are best able to focus on all that Satan wants us to believe about others…and ourselves… and there, in the clutches of his message for us, we find ourselves bound in a web of turmoil, loneliness and pain.

Want to hear the real truth?

None of us – not one is exempt.  We all have our struggles… our doubts... our fears.  We all hear the lies.   Whether your sister across the aisle is your friend or not, the saying holds true - we likes to be liked… or at least tolerated.

Somehow, we have created a belief that unity is only attainable when all parties agree with one another on all issues.  

Not so. 

Unity is not uniformity. 

Are we all different?  Yes – in so many ways.  In our looks, our talents, our relationships, our skin color, our size, our tax bracket… but we have one thing in common – we are covered by the righteousness of Jesus – and that, my sisters, is why Satan is seeking to gain your attention.

He hates what he sees when he looks at you.  He hates when he sees us loving on one another…encouraging one another…growing together – and so his main objective is to bring pain, uncertainty and division.

Ask my kids and they’ll tell you the many times I’ve told them that “there are billions of people in this world – many who are ready and willing to hurt your feelings and cut you down… but when you walk in these doors, you are free to be you. 

Inside the walls of our family I will not allow you to slander, mock and hurt one another. 

In here, you’re accepted… you’re safe. 

In here, we build each other up and encourage when another is down. 

In here, you’re always loved…without question…without reservation.

In here…in here, we do grace.”

And to you, my sisters in Christ, I say the same.  Can we make this our mantra?  Can we commit to doing this for one another?  Can we agree that this world is broken and hurting and sometimes the weight of it all wearies the soul and weakens the spirit?  Can we agree that inside the doors of the Kingdom, we need a respite?  A safe retreat?

A place where we can see beyond what meets the eye and love the soul within?

There are billions of people in this world, sisters.  Many who are ready and willing to hurt your feelings and cut you down… but when you walk in these doors of the Kingdom, you are free to be you. 

Inside the walls of our family, must we slander, mock and hurt one another?

Can we instead say… 'in here, you’re accepted… you’re safe?'

In here, we build each other up and will encourage you when you’re down. 

In here, you’re always loved…without question…without reservation.

Because in here, we do grace.

“Let me give you a new command: Love one another.

In the same way I loved you, you love one another.

This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other.”

-John 13

Family Creed

Tim and I spent a few days in California last week.  While we were gone, we took a good long look at our family and decided to jot down a few specifics of WHO we ARE as a family - or at least who we WANT to be.

Here's what we came up with:

After watching so many families being torn apart (even experiencing it ourselves), we've realized how precious FAMILY is and know that the things that tear people apart are seldom equal in value to the relationship they could have. 

Hoping to get this printed on a canvas and hanging it in our kitchen as a way to remind our kids that we BELONG together and that no matter what - I've got your back.

Rest

Life. It's a busy place.

Constant pressures, demands, need-to-do's and want-to-do's can drive a woman crazy.  Yet the message  I hear repeated over and over again has been "REST".

I hear it in on the radio, at church, at a women's conference... even in my quiet times alone with God.  Can I just be honest here?

It started getting on my nerves?

I don't have time to rest!

I'm not against resting.  But more times than not, I feel more like the proverbial woman who's lamp does not go out at night - and frankly, I'd be ready to pull the plug for a few hours of shut-eye.

Let me explain - though most mama's will completely understand.  I do sleep.  I do rest.  I even get approximately twenty-four minutes a little quiet time most evenings on the couch next to Tim before one of us goes slack-jawed and cross eyed in our attempt to stay awake, but I find it hard to feel at rest.

There is so. much. to. do!


And I can't make them it go away!  Four kids, twenty hens, one cow, couple of cats and a lazy ole' dog will produce more signs of life than seems possible.  Add that on top of numerous other projects and responsibilities and my days are packed full!

And I'm ok with that, but, well.. a break would be nice!  It just seems impossible.

Still, there it hung.  The constant reminder to rest?

This morning while running, I was tired.

Wanted to quit.

Wanted to die rest.

I was only halfway to my goal and quitting wasn't on my agenda.  I knew it was simply mind over matter.  Take another step.  Keep moving.  Don't quit. (Funny how a weedy ditch covered in dew can look more welcoming than a Sleep Number Bed... with clean sheets.)

Keeping my eyes on the road, I kept moving and a verse came to my mind.

"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on Thee."  Isaiah 26:3.  

Peace.

Rest.

Ahhh.. and herein lies the secret!

I couldn't quit halfway through my run.  I hadn't reached my goal yet.  And though everything within me cried out for a break... I knew I couldn't stop.

That's motherhood... that's life!  (Don't get me wrong - every woman needs a break.. take one!  I'm speaking of motherhood/life as a whole - start to finish)

I realized that I could lie in a  hammock under the shade of palm trees for a week straight...

I could listen to the sounds of the ocean waves and sea gulls calling to one another overhead while waiting for a maid to deliver a luncheon of Strawberry Spinach salad and Black Tie Mousse Cake (and a slice of pizza cause I'm really just a simple country girl)...

I could be in the most peaceful place on earth, yet still not be at rest.

Why?

Because resting is birthed in the mind.

It is learning to focus on He Who gives strength, whispers peace, offers joy and envelops with love.

Deliberately turning away from the worries of

'Can I make it?'

'Am I strong enough?'

'What will happen?'

'What if I fail?'

'Will I ever get a break?'

To,

'You, oh Lord, are good!'

'You are my Rock!'

'In You, I find peace.'

'You are my strength!'

'You are worthy of all my praise!'

And later, as I sat on my front porch step, resting, breathing in the freshness of morning, I realized the difference focus had made.

I had felt stronger.  Ready to run again.  Renewed.  Encouraged.  Energized.

I had reached my goal with ease and it felt good!

Physical rest isn't always an option (at least, not the amount we'd like), but God keeps us steady on our feet when I shift our eyes towards Him.

He takes our burdens and replaces it with rest.

People with their minds set on you, 

you keep completely whole,

Steady on their feet,

because they keep at it and don't quit.

Depend on God and keep at it

because in the Lord God you have a sure thing.

Isaiah 26

"This is the time and place to rest,
   to give rest to the weary.
This is the place to lay down your burden." 

Isaiah 28

Treasure Hunting

I can't find it, mom!

Sound familiar?  If I kept track of the minutes hours I spend helping my kids find their stuff, I'm sure I'd be amazed!  

This morning while digging under beds and refolding blankets - all in search of an ever elusive iPod, this memory from quite a while ago came back to me.  Thought I'd share it with you today.

July 10, 2006

Treasure Hunting

I love those that love me, and those that seek me find me.  Proverbs 8:17

It amazes me, really!  I never would have known a six-year-old child was capable of losing so many things!  From shoes to baseballs, golf balls to gloves, a half hour with Tyler, and the possibility of hearing, “I can’t find it”, becomes more and more probable. 

The shoes are usually the first to disappear.  To lose them is one thing, but what Tyler did with his brand new sandals that spring, really pushed the limits. 

We had just plowed up the garden, but hadn’t yet had a chance to plant anything.  Two-year-old Amy and her big brother, Tyler, found this to be a source for hours of entertainment.  I enjoyed watching them as they dug. They were full of ideas and, occasionally, I would stop by the garden and listen to their plans of digging to Thailand so they could visit Uncle Luke and Aunt Amy, who are missionaries down there.  Seeing that they probably wouldn’t be reaching Luke and Amy’s home anytime that afternoon, I returned to the kitchen to prepare supper.

The next morning, I told Tyler to get his sandals on, as we would soon be leaving to buy groceries.

“I can’t find them, mom”, he said.  Groaning at the all too familiar words, I went to help him look for the missing shoes.

“Where did you have them last?” I asked.

“Uhmmm, I think it was out by the garden,” he replied.  Out to the garden we went, where we found a shovel with a broken handle, a rake, a cup from the kitchen, one muddy sock that used to be white, and a sandal.

“Here’s one sandal!” he proclaimed triumphantly.

“Great,” I said half-heartedly, as I looked at the mess in the yard.  “Now, where is the other one?”

Suddenly, his look of triumph changed to one that said “oops-I-might-get-in-trouble-for-this”, as his eyes shifted nervously towards the garden.

I turned my head to see what he might be looking at and I noticed that our one-way route to Thailand had been newly excavated.

“What happened to your hole to Uncle Luke’s?” I asked.

“Well, we got tired of digging, so we filled it in.” he said.

Hardly blaming him for giving up so quickly, I simply nodded, and continued to look for the missing sandal. 

“Uh, mom?” Tyler said quietly. “I…I think I remember where my sandal is.”

”Ok,” I said slowly, wondering why he looked so serious, “where is it?”

“Well, I… uh… I buried it.”

“You what?!?” I asked incredulously.

“I buried it!” he replied. “Amy and I got tired of digging that hole to Thailand, so I stuck my sandal in there and covered it up.  I think it should be about…uhmmm.. right… right there!”  I stood looking in disbelief at my son, who was pointing in the general direction of the entire garden.

“Tyler, what on earth got into you that made you want to bury your sandal?” I asked.  Shrugging his shoulders, he stood there silently. 

I picked up the shovel with the broken handle and handed it to him.

“Start digging.” I commanded, “I’ll come back out after a while and help you if you can’t find it.”  He dug for a while, and eventually I went out to help him. We finally gave up, went to find some other shoes for Tyler, and set out to buy our nearly-forgotten groceries.

The next day, Tyler and I again headed out to the garden to search for the sandal.  Desiring to be a godly mother who seizes every opportunity to teach her children about God, I decided this would be the perfect time to tell him the story from the Bible of the man who had buried his talent. After the story was over, we decided we must be digging in the wrong spot, so moving to another corner of the garden, we again set to work. 

Soon Bible stories were one of the furthest things from my mind.  All the digging we were doing was producing nothing but a sore back, and an ever-increasing frustration with the foolishness of my child.  Ignoring an inner prompting to pray about the missing shoe, I instead began to expound to my son that “these shoes cost money! And not only that, they were Nikes!  You don’t just BURY Nikes!  Where do you think our money comes from?  Do you think we LIKE to spend money on shoes?” 

Satisfied that my son had learned his lesson, we continued to dig in silence. Just when I was certain the next shovel full of dirt would, indeed, land me in Aunt Amy’s flowerbed, Tyler asked, “Mommy, don’t you think we should pray that we could find my sandal?”

With a sigh, I stuck the shovel into the dirt, “Yes, Tyler,” I said, “we should pray.”  So bowing our heads, we offered up our prayer to the Heavenly Father, telling Him all about the lost sandal and our desire to find it.  And as often happens, several minutes after praying, I pulled the missing sandal from the ground.

Several weeks later, I told this experience with some ladies at Bible Study. One of the ladies, Mamie, shared how this reminded her of an illustration she had heard. 

“When we want to find a treasure, we have to dig.  You can’t always expect the precious gems to just be lying around for all to see.  You have to WANT the treasure, and DIG to find it.  It’s the same way with the Word of God. Sometimes we read the Bible, and we say, ‘I didn’t get anything out of that’, but we have to DIG to find the real treasure, the precious gems.  Those are the verses that become extra dear to us.”

As I thought about what Mamie had shared with me, I realized the truth in it. While I had to use the right tools to find Tyler’s sandal, I have to use certain tools to find the treasures God has for me in His Word.  I began to make a list of the tools that I use. There are many other tools that we can use to find the treasures in God’s Word, but here are a few suggestions.

First of course is time.  Since life gets busy, I don’t always have a complete slot of time to use to study God’s Word, but that’s where the other tools come in handy.

Next – a highlighter.  I have come to love highlighting the verses that stand out to me as I read the Bible.  Sometimes I jot a little note beside them explaining why that verse means so much to me.  Someday, my children will be able to look at the “jewels” in my Bible, and that will be a way for them to see who God is to me.

Another tool is a three by five spiral notepad.  I keep this “tool” above my kitchen sink with precious verses that I want to memorize written inside.  The verses that I didn’t have time to ponder earlier are right in front of me to meditate on as I clean up my kitchen each day. 

The sandal episode unfortunately didn’t change my son’s habit of losing “stuff”. Just recently, he lost not one but TWO baseball gloves!  So looking in my concordance, I grab my highlighter.  I see there are a lot of “treasures” Ty could use that talk about the lost being found.  On the other hand, “spare the rod…” keeps coming to mind, also!  Hmmm...

Prayer:  Dear God, I know that there are so many treasures in Your Word.  Today I want to search for the treasure that You have for me, please, help me to find it.  Amen

Welcome, Sweet Baby

Welcome to the world, sweet baby!

Kennedy Raine

Only love can be divided endlessly, and still not diminish.

-Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Proud Papa and Mama

Psalm 139:13-16 

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. 

Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

My frame was not hidden from you,when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.

Blessed Be Your Name

"The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; 

    may the name of the Lord be praised.”

Job 1:21

On this day, twelve years ago, my heart clenched in sorrow as I heard those words.

She's gone.

Suddenly sixty-nine didn't seem as old as it once had.  Just as suddenly, I was without my grandma.

I stood at her graveside, still naive to the loss I would feel throughout the years... how I miss her still.

Today, my heart skipped a beat as I read the words on my phone while standing in a checkout line.

SHE'S HERE!!

Such delight!  Such excitement!  The joy of new life!

My brother Chris and his wife Karista had welcomed their firstborn, Kennedy Raine, and to say that I am ecstatic would be an understatement.

On this anniversary of sorrow, God once more showed His love of GIVING and we now have new reason to celebrate!  

Blessed be the name of the Lord! 

Miscarriage: Erin M's Story

This morning my brother reminded me that today would have been the due date of their little one.  The heavy sadness I felt surprised me.  What could have been a day full of joy and excitement was instead a day filled with laundry and a cranky Kobe.

Yet, I can't help but think about what God has done through the loss we have experienced and I will continue to praise Him for it.

When Elizabeth told her story several weeks ago, I heard from so many women.  Women who expressed their gratitude for the encouragement they found within the words that Elizabeth shared.  I've posted some of their stories here, and today I have another that I want to pass along to you.

Erin M. is a mother of two.  She and her husband, Adam, experienced a miscarriage with her first pregnancy.  Here is Erin's story:

 

I just read Elizabeth's story and wanted to let both of you know how glad I am that she shared her experience.  I also had a miscarriage at nine weeks with my first pregnancy.  It was a horrible experience and my faith was weak.  I was angry with God for a long time.   

Actually, I'm ashamed to admit it, but I think I was angry until I got pregnant again.  I felt as if I had lost all of my hopes and dreams for having a child.  I know so much more now.  Like the fact that I can't depend on my "feelings" for truth but I can depend on the word.   

Then after I was pregnant again came an almost paralyzing fear which I now know was the devil's work.  I did have a very difficult pregnancy.  I began bleeding early in my second pregnancy and thought for sure I was losing my second child.  I sought help from my obgyn right away and got on hormones to help my body maintain the pregnancy.   

The battle was not over though, I had a pregnancy, like many with nausea and vomiting and then at about 5 months came the pre-term contractions.  Abigayle Pauline was born 6 weeks early, I got to hold her tiny blue body for only seconds before they whisked her away to the NICU.   

Once again I feared for my baby's life.  Abigayle was in the NICU for two weeks.  She was only on the ventilator for 1 day though.  I was there with her every moment that I could be but it ripped my heart out to leave her each night.  Abigayle grew and in eight more months I was very surprised to find out that I was already three months pregnant again!   

I had another difficult pregnancy with pre-term labor beginning at twenty-nine weeks.  I was on bedrest for over two months, but God gave us a healthy baby boy!  Finally I got to keep my baby with me. No one was taking him away.  It was my dream come true.   

Abigayle and Owen today

Today I have two healthy, strong children!  God IS good! I have often wondered about my first baby.  I used to really wonder if my baby was in heaven.  

I recently read the book "Heaven is for Real".  It is about a boy who went to heaven and came back.  In the book the boy talks about his sister.  You see his mother had a miscarriage before he was born and had never told the boy about it.  When the boy returned from heaven he told his mother that he missed his sister, he had seen her in heaven!  When I read about this I was at work on a break and I started to cry.  I thought of my baby in heaven and that some day I will get to meet my baby.  I don't know why I questioned it before.  

Reading this boy's account of seeing his sister just really made it hit home.  I was joyful, but it opened an old wound.  A wound from losing my baby, that had never healed.  Over the next couple of nights I would lay in bed and bawl.  I didn't understand.  I thought I had put this all behind me.  Turns out I hadn't, and I needed to have that time to grieve.

You see I thought I had grieved when it happened, but I was too angry to grieve.  It was almost like I hadn't forgiven God.  I had accepted it, but I was still wounded.  Carrying around this unforgiveness for, of all people, my Savior.  Can you believe that?!

As I write my story I can see how weak my faith has been, and how silly it is to withhold forgiveness to my Lord and Savior.  But....God is good.  He never left my side.  I didn't realize I had such pain left inside. I'm so thankful that he has revealed it.  It is so freeing.  I can see that God is doing a work in me and I am proud to say now that I believe that He will bring it to fruition!

If you would like to contact Erin or I, we would love to hear from you!  Email me here and I will pass it along to Erin.